the past 2 months feel like two years. or that I've grown up twice my age, but in a good way. I drive a gas effecient honda civic (baby sister's hand me down), I have a job that pays me what I deserve for the amazing talents I give to my industry, I have my own home that I am decorating exactly the way I want, I quit smoking with ease and effeciency, I take two of the f'ing cutest dogs on walks around echo park and they listen to my commands, I remember to take my meds and eat, I have good self esteem and am looking forward to the future.
I remember that overwhelming and recent feeling of wanting to slam my car into a tree and make it all go away. I remember the moment when I decided to do it at 40 miles an hour instead of 80. The world of difference velocity makes. How glad I am that I chose what I did. How glad I am that being BPS means Attempting and not Actualizing. The scars on my chest fade fast. I touch them to remember. I am excited to live. It tastes good.
I remember that overwhelming and recent feeling of wanting to slam my car into a tree and make it all go away. I remember the moment when I decided to do it at 40 miles an hour instead of 80. The world of difference velocity makes. How glad I am that I chose what I did. How glad I am that being BPS means Attempting and not Actualizing. The scars on my chest fade fast. I touch them to remember. I am excited to live. It tastes good.
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